Situationship
Relationship
Friendship
Datingship
Whatevership
Any kind of “-ship”
As a lady who’s been in a variety of relationships – both healthy and total bummers – I can assure you that being single with standards is WAY more peaceful than being in any kind of “-ship” with compromise.
I’ve been in those “I don’t know what we’d call it” type situationships, that last for a few weeks or months – the whole time filled with confusion, no real forward movement, and (honestly) disappointment. The internal knowing that “this definitely isn’t it” constantly running through your mind, but not willing to let it go because “it’s better than nothing.”
I’ve been in happy relationships, which were (for the most part) healthy, and for various reasons simply didn’t move any further. Even though there were tears in the break-up, there was a deeper (subconscious) peace, knowing it was clearing room for something greater.
I’ve been in relationships where I realized, after-the-fact, they were abusive in one way or another. Sometimes we can’t see things that are right in front of us / too close to us.
I’ve been in relationships that I knew were not great, but stayed because they weren’t terrible. Mediocre leads to a slow and painful drought.
I’ve been in friendships where either myself or the man were interested in the other one romantically, but the feelings weren’t mutual, and I’m grateful that they organically disintegrated over time.
I’ve been single for more years than I ever thought I would be, but let me tell ya’ – as much as I’m looking forward to marriage and knowing who my man is, and getting to grow together and learn each other, I’m incredibly thankful to not be in the *wrong* relationship.
There is no such thing as pretend peace.
— You have peace or you don’t.
— You’re seeking the Lord’s wisdom or you’re blinding yourself to it.
— You are willing to address the difficult things or you’re not.
IF YOU ARE COMPROMISING VALUES in a relationship, this is for you.
— Address what needs to be addressed.
— Face what you need to.
— Cry it out if that’s what needs to happen.
But don’t compromise on your values because it’s “better than nothing.”
Exchanging peace for mediocre is definitely not worth it!
