I found myself wanting to text him SO bad!

“Him” being a man I was interested in years ago. A man who’d never expressed any genuine interest, but who had provided some conversations here and there over the couple months we’d explored dating.

And by “explored dating” I mean, we spent time together, texted back and forth, and it wasn’t going anywhere, at all ? It was flatlined the whole time, but it was something. And after a lonnnnng drought of absolutely nothing, it felt appealing. Can you relate?

Ladies, let me just say – if he’s truly interested, you won’t be questioning and confused ? Hard pill to swallow, but good medicine to take!

There wasn’t anything in particular that prompted the thought of reaching out to him a few days back, but it seemed like a better option than not texting him (in the moment).

Thank God I have strategies in place for just such an occasion as this, because I DIDN’T text him ? Even though I wanted to (at the moment) ?

Here are three things I have in place just in case such a temptation should arise:

1. ? DELETE HIS NUMBER ? Immediately.

You already know it’s stale and not going anywhere, so STOP WASTING TIME (both yours and his) and delete his number. Unfriend on social media. Stop following his accounts. Block him if you need to. No stalking. No “checking in.” No more. Be done, once and for all. You MUST do this, so that when temptation arises, you’re out of harm’s way.

Let me tell you what. There’s absolutely NO WAY I’m going to reach out to mutual friends to get his number just so I can reach out with a lame message to attempt to create something out of nothing, only to know it’s a dead end before I start. Call it pride, but it’s kept me in check when I’m wanting to reach out to a man whose number I no longer have!


I have a couple of friends I know I can reach out to in lieu of reaching out to “him” when the temptation arises. I text them instead. I send them a voice note instead. I barrage them with all the dumb things I would have said to “him” instead.


Sometimes, I want to barrage the guy with questions (i.e. “Why did you ghost me?” “Why did you initiate contact if you’re not actually interested?” etc.) and that’s one of the most degrading and humiliating things you can do (I have college Susan to thank for that hard-learned-lesson ?). Journal your thoughts, your questions, your hurts, and pour your heart out to the Lord, alone.

That guy, who gave you half-hearted attention, on a whim ? cannot fill that void.


Turn to the Lord and let Him fill that void ? He’s always there. He’s unchanging. And His love never fails.